If you’re someone with adult ADD or ADHD, how often do you have circular conversations? You know the kind. You go ’round and ’round with someone, and you’re both saying the exact same thing, but you can’t make yourself understood? Isn’t that frustrating? Is it possible for someone AD/HD to have less stress in their communications?
The frustration you’re feeling comes from a sense of imbalance because you’re misunderstood. Feelings of “Nobody Understands Me” promote your sense of loneliness that we all feel at one time or another. You’re definitely not alone.
This can happen much less frequently when you learn a few simple things about communicating effectively.
Doesn’t it seem like some people just get everything they want? It’s probably because they’re good communicators. They aren’t worried about expressing their desires and are very clear about them. So, they go through life much easier. For you, it’s not quite that easy.
For example, you call the doctor’s office and ask for an appointment. So, the receptionist asks you what’s a good time for it. You say, “Wednesday.” So, she says, “How about 8:45?” You tell her, “No, that won’t work. I take my son to school at that time.” So, she gives you another appointment time of 10:15, but you say, “No can’t do that, either. I have an appointment to get my hair cut.” When this goes back and forth a few times, aren’t you both frustrated?
Yes! What should you have said instead is, “I’d like an appointment on Wednesday between 1 and 5 p.m.,” none of the back and forth would have been needed? Boom! Appointment at 1:15, and you’re all set.
In business, clear communications are extremely important. Let’s say that your boss gives you a complicated project to complete for her, but when she explained it to you, you understood most of it and figured you’d just iron out the details as you went along. Bad idea! Ask questions and get answers that make sense before you even begin to assure that you are doing things right.
Employees need help to get their jobs done properly, too. If you have a task that you need to be completed, give the most complete directions that you can. Write the whole thing out on paper, if the task is particularly complicated. And the most important part is to let your employee know that they can come to you with questions anytime they feel unclear. This “open door” policy is helpful in seeing that a task is done properly and on time. Knowing you’re there for them will even increase your employees’ level of confidence.
The key is to be conscious of clarity when you speak or when you’re asking for things. If you can improve your communication skills, it will help you in every facet of your life.
